New to this blogging game and away from my serious work as a representative of the people I thought it was time to readdress my appearance.

Foremost in my thoughts was the need to sharpen up my bling.

Hence when I heard there were some gongs on offer I thought I'd put in a good word for myself.

I'd like to say I had a part in the decision to start a war in Iraq...but I can't

I wish I could say I sexed up a dossier or two..but I didn't

I might have thought there were WMD just 45 minutes away from my constituency...but there weren't

So what to do?

Perhaps I'll just ask my mate Pete if he has any spare - he's been in Brousewells for a while, he must have something I could borrow.